Asa has been asked many times by me and others “do you miss children
of your age’ OR when she is in company of her own age “how it is to be kids of
your age?”
And consistently Asa has been expressing “it does not matter
to me”.
When Asa was learning Kathak, I asked her “will it make difference
if you learn with kids of your age”. She
expressed with confidence “no Ma, It does not matter, I will learn in any which
way”. My reasoning “If you learn with kids of your age, you will learn more,
you will have more challenge, you will get more exposure” – She was clear what
she is. I was wrong, she learnt what she wanted to learn - she dance with 6yrs and also with 18yrs old.
Mother in me also thought of talking to Anjana to find a
group of her age
Faculty in me stopped me
Confidence of Asa did not allow me to move ahead with my
thoughts
Well, My reflection “I am operating my own beliefs and I am
so much wrong when it comes to asa and on top of that I keep checking with Asa “how
was it to be with child of your age?”. Her reaction has been consistent “nothing
different”.
Recently she went to beach with a child her age, my first
question “so how was it be with the child of your age” She smiled, She accepted me
with my repeated checking on this age matter, she shared “fun”. She only have been
talking about “beach and fun" she had, I see no reference of the child who was
of her age…………I know she likes beach and she enjoyed - THAT ALL. Possibly
mother in me wants to hears something else:).
Ratnesh never checks or ask such questions – or rather he has no such
inhibitions.
Am I checking to be sure that If she needs the company of her age, I will create opportunity? Checking
myself “Whenever she needs company of her age, will she not create opportunity for
herself”? If yes, why this agevari de?
Am I operating from my beliefs?
Am I influenced with conventional way of looking at learning
and age?
Am I operating form my own fear of my own parenting and facilitation?
Am I afraid that she is missing if she is not in company of
her own age?
I am thankful I have Asa around me who has her own thinking.
She beautifully stands for what she thinks and allows me to stay with my own
thoughts. She never discards my funny thoughts – she says “its okay to think
like this”.
Looking around me I know I am never in company of exactly 41
years old with me – I have people around me who are 10 yrs younger or older to
me………..So what is the big deal about this age? When I interact I do not even
ask “are you 41yrs – will I get challenge in your company, will I learn in your
company? I just enjoy with people around me. So same is with asa – she just
ENJOYS. She laughs when she is with Samarath who is 2yrs or she communicates
with Paranv who is 4yrs or Radhika who is 11yrs old or anyone any age or Namrata
or Mina who are 30+
Similar Age - does it matter to Asa?
I am happy with my own journey of this thoughts - thanks to Asa I have been able to express, experiment and explore this thought. I am at peace with my own understanding "it does not matter to her, or rather she is capable of thinking for herself, I do not need to take rope in my hand"
6 comments:
I loved reading your thoughts about me
I thank you for having confidence in me, believing me and understanding me, it makes me happy.
I am proud to able to live and mingle with a wide age group and to be able the learn and have fun with all.
asawari
While i agree same-age-peers is not such a big thing, i do wonder sometimes that it should not happen that asawari (or any other child) gets ONLY people much older and much younger - but not of the same age.
I think for a balanced environment one would expose the child to a wide mix of ages.
Obviously IF this was in our control ;-)
Yup rat - agree with exposure.
I am exploring my own beliefs - how I operate form my beliefs...this concept of "checking" or confirming to my thoughts .....
I guess different kids, different thoughts.......nothing is SAME for all as per my beliefs. I need to flexible to accept the wide variety of thoughts.
A lot of times I think we use age as a proxy for 'match'. We as individuals tend to be in different stages of a learning cycle, which makes age a bad proxy.
When I was learning Kathak, I felt like a kid, wished I was in the kids batch. But so many places I see that there are kids batches and adult batches, and I am still wondering why not wear a different lens?
Sree
This rasies a lot of questions - the boundaries of
child and faculty or teacher
child and parent
adult and child
bog child and small child
Age appropriate..........
how about only one category "LEARNER"
aditi, somewhere i had this question of "same age" in my mind, by reading this blog, all boundaries faded up.Where in life we deal with same age people? agreed with ratnesh's thought of exposure.
Post a Comment