Learning as a learner

I have been learning dance and performed on stage with all ages around me (5 to 40yrs)

My learning as a learner

I am INTO it in my own way, my teacher is into it in her own way.

I am learner – I learn in different ways – seeing, reflecting, reciting, instructions, practice, inspiration,…… etc,

I like to chat, I also chat when my teacher wants me to be serious. When she wants me to focus on dance – I focus on one child’s broken ghoogroos. When she wants me to smile and enjoy dance – I think about something else and smile by force to avoid put downs and scream.

I like to interact with my peers- infact this is the best part of the class I like – Be with my fellow learner and just chat, interact and practice together.

I am also performing on stage - the whole sardarad is on my teacher – As a learner I am at peace, so even when my teacher is worried, I do not connect with her worries, as this performance is all by her, for her – I am just an artist there. Sometimes even I feel like a puppet in the class – cannot speak, cannot ask questions, cannot share my expression, cannot tell my needs. I have to come in the class – learn the dance as my teacher wants me to learn, follow the rules set by the teacher. She keeps on telling me to smile with stress all around her. She even scolds my peers and friend and say “smile”. I feel sad for my teacher and my friends.

We have to come early to practice and ensure we perform well - If my friends do not come any day my teacher gets angry. I am sad for teacher and my friends.

When my friends do not perform well, they have even been asked “if you do not perform well you will be out of the performance, or you have to be here whole day doing the same”. Some listen, some do not – as they are fine to go out of the performance. I feel sad for my teacher.

If my friends come late, they are not allowed to dance in the class, I feel sad for my teacher and for my friends.

My teacher is very hard working, she is stressed, she is in pain - I feel sad for my teacher and my friends.

My teacher wants us to perform well, but she is sad – I am sad for my teacher and my friends.

I do not know why my teacher wants me to perform for the audience – I want to perform for myself and share the happiness with the audience – To make audience feel happy, my teacher is sad - I am sad for my teacher.

God - why do you make one teacher? I want only friends in my class – I just enjoy with them. They listen to me, they share with me, and they are with me. They teach me, I learn from them. All in my class are my friends but not my teacher – she is sad. I am sad for my teacher.

I was reflecting on my own sessions as a faculty

• When I think kids are not listening – how do I behave?
• When I think kids are not serious – how do I behave?
• When I think kids are taking things for granted – how do I behave?
• When I think kids are not respecting – how do I behave?
• When I think me and my subject matter are important, not the kids – how do I behave?
• When I think kids are learner and they want to learn - how do I behave?
• When I respect then as equal – how do I behave?
• When I listen to them – how do I behave?
• When I believe in then – how do I behave?

My apologies to all the learner with whom I have misbehaved consciously or unconsciously. I am learning and growing - thank you all who gave me opportunity to learn.